Prioritizing health is the way of the mature modern man. Self-care is something that everyone should do, especially if they are feeling stressed or low.
Men’s self-care isn’t much different than women’s. Men too, love being pampered, feeling healthy, and experience relaxation. The only problem is that they don’t know how to ask for it or that because women have dominated the self-care space that the whole concept of self-care has been stigmatized as a woman’s thing.
"Men’s self-care is just as important as women’s self-care!"
Female influencers dominate the realm of self-care. Too often, men are taught to think that self-care is feminine - the legacy burden of patriarchy. Unfortunately, that means a lot of men aren’t getting their needs met because they are worried about being excluded from the masculinity club. I’m saying this and saying this loud! Men’s self-care is just as important as women’s self-care!
Most men repel themselves from self-care activities that might appear too feminine. Men don’t want to be seen as less manly, even if it’s an activity they might really enjoy or benefit from. The traditional masculine norm of dominance and emotional control makes chronic pain and empty drudgery a way of life. The values of “independence” and “self-reliance” still run thick in the traditional masculine psyche. The problem is that rather than leading men to self-care, they lead them to avoidance and denial.
"Men are notorious for not taking care of themselves."
Conversations about male self-care is significantly under-represented. This neglect is because society tells men that they must be self-reliant, self-sufficient, and able to hold their own with little or no stress. The world convinces them they should not show weakness or self-doubt. Expressing their emotions becomes taboo which leads to, many men bottling up their feelings.
I’m not claiming all men feel beholden to these traditional masculine ideals, nor am I suggesting that all health ills can be traced back to traditional man-box mindsets. I’m not trying to overgeneralise things but this is the common practice around us.
Men are notorious for not taking care of themselves. Why? I’m not sure. It could be the “suck it up” attitude so many are raised with.
Every man has different ways of practicing self-care, but sometimes they just don’t realize when they need it. One of the keys to positive masculinity is identifying when you need a mental health break or doing some self-care.
Men struggle to identify when they’re experiencing burnout and when is it necessary for them to call out for help. When you’re experiencing burnout, some identifiers include having trouble getting to work, struggling with a lack of energy, or not getting enough sleep. Maybe you’re stretched too thin, or you keep saying yes to every task put in front of you. If your work is all-consuming, then you might be experiencing burnout. At any point, if these symptoms are present, then you should take some time for self-care.
Another reason why you might need to focus on self-care is if you’re finding yourself lost. Not physically lost in the woods or something, but directionless. Self-care allows you to center yourself around the most important person: you. Men’s self-care should be focused on making you better.
Self care should cover mental, physical and spiritual needs. When men hear the word self-care, they often think about self-care in the physical sense. They might focus on healthy diets, sports or something that will help them look after their bodies. That is fine, but physical fitness should be combined with specific mental self-care activities to ensure your mental fitness is at the top of your game. Your mind is a muscle too. Don’t neglect it!
"Men’s self-care should be focused on making you better."
There is a pervasive societal norm whereby men place their own health and well-being at the very bottom of their priority list. But you can take care of very little when you’re not taking care of yourself. If you’ve ever been on a plane, you know you have to secure your own oxygen mask before assisting others. I believe all men should not only have permission to take care of themselves, but should be held accountable to it. Self-care isn’t selfish.
Self-care is prioritising activities that bring you happiness and benefits to your life. When balancing life, it can be easy at times to forget about taking care of yourself, but allowing time where you and your happiness are your primary goal can be beneficial to both your physical and mental health.
It is important to remember that you are worth giving time and attention to and just as you prioritise the wellbeing of those you care about, you should also prioritise your own personal wellbeing. Taking time out each day for yourself isn’t a luxury, it is an investment in your mental and physical health. Prioritising yourself and your mental health on your good days, will make it easier to keep up that routine if you experience bad ones.
"You can take care of very little when you’re not taking care of yourself."
Self-care has never been more important that it is right now. We all need ways to manage stress and reduce anxiety on our own in a healthy way.
Quick, at the top of your mind, what comes to your mind when you think of self-care? Do you automatically envision a woman pampering herself in a bubble bath? Or a room dimly lit infused with essential oil and scented candles while doing her nails? Well, the truth is, at its core, self-care is a set of rituals, regimens, or practices that help us recharge, re-center, and achieve balance in their own well-being and happiness. Self-care takes work and time and is more than just pampering yourself. And yes, it’s something men should absolutely put to practice as well.
Self-care in short is the act of taking time to focus on yourself. Allocate certain time during each day, or weekly, to put your stressors on the back burner, with the goal of improving your mental health.
"Self-care is an incredibly personal practice, and there’s no “one-size-fits-all” solution to it."
Self-care has always been thought of as something practiced primarily by women, men are behind the curve and may not even know where to begin.
Self-care is an incredibly personal practice, and there’s no “one-size-fits-all” solution to it. But that’s also the beauty of it. Self-care can mean anything you want it to mean as long as it will help you stay mentally and physically well.
True, in order to practice self-care, you need to make time for it. But when you work to nurture all parts of yourself, there’s a good chance you’ll feel happier and more balanced. Here are a few suggestions for men.
Physical activity
Physical activity has shown to have great psychological benefits that include higher self-esteem, better sleep, and decreased feelings of depression and anxiety. When you engage in exercise, your body releases endorphins that help trigger a “feel good” sensation similar to that of morphine. It’s a great way to not only keep your body physically healthy and in shape but also set the foundation of any self-care regimen.
Physical activity, however, does not only equates to the gym. It can be as simple as getting out of the house and taking a stroll around the neighbourhood. Nature walks and getting in tune with the elements are essential aspects of men’s self-care.
There’s something soothing and healing about nature, and it’s one of the best and easiest forms of self-care.
We know that exercise releases endorphins that help elevate our mood, but it doesn’t mean you have to hit the gym for hours. If you spend most of your day sitting and staring at screens, get up and stretch or walk for a few minutes, not only it gives you a mental break but can help release those same endorphins.
Get yourself some accountability, like a committed gym buddy or a friend who can cheerlead for you. This can help you to persevere.
"There’s something soothing and healing about nature, and it’s one of the best and easiest forms of self-care."
Doing physical activity can be a great way of practicing self care, as it is time during which you can focus on yourself and your body. Taking time out to exercise can also give you alone time to process your thoughts and emotions.
Spending time with friends and family
Spending time with people who make you feel good about yourself is also a form of self care. It is important to be able to recognise the people who genuinely care about you and your well-being and who show you kindness and love. Reach out to those who you enjoy spending time with and organise to spend some time with them doing the things you enjoy.
Organise a communal self-care day! Invite friends around and spend the whole day taking it easy and relaxing in self-care activities together. Be open and upfront about wanting to unwind and make sure your friends are on board.
Communal self-care for men may seem odd. But there isn’t anything wrong with it. Besides, it helps them get close with their friends again, helping them reconnect through new activities without feeling like they are being selfish about self-care.
You might be surprised at how self-care discovery can help you get to know others better and discover new sides to people you have known for years.
Recite affirmations.
How could uttering a few simple words really improve my life, you’d ask? Affirmations are positive statements that help you to “recalibrate” your mind and overcome self-sabotaging negative thoughts. Affirmations permeate our conscious and subconscious minds, helping to reprogram our thinking patterns.
Affirmations are incredibly personal and can be tailored to your preferences. Some people enjoy creating their own affirmations and reading them out aloud. You could also find from internet and books, anything that resonates with you. The best part about guided affirmations is that you don’t even have to really pay attention to what is being said as your subconscious is absorbing the message whether you are paying close attention or not. Adding affirmations to your self-care routine is definitely worth a try.
Be vocal about the things that light up your day, like family or pets. Make it a priority in life by practising positive self-talk on days where you may not feel as good about how they went. Try to find the silver lining in each day. You’ll feel better about it.
Reading.
Reading can be a good way to practice self care. It is a way of slowing down and taking a healthy time away from interacting with other people. Reading can allow our minds to travel to different places and take our focus away from worries we might have or pressures in our daily lives. If you want to take some time out to read it can be a good idea to put your phone away for a while so that it isn’t a distraction to you.
Books can also be a great way of learning how to cope better when times get tough. Self-help books and books about particular coping techniques such as mindfulness meditation or cognitive-behavioural therapy (CBT) can be extremely useful. This is only a recommendation. Feel free to read whatever genre that you like and of your interests.
Organising your space.
Cleaning and organising your personal space can be a great way to practice self care as the task can give you time to clear your head while also creating a space that you can enjoy being in.
Whether it be tidying your room, organising your desk, or cleaning your car, these simple tasks can give your mind time to process what is going on in your life, and focuses your energy on doing something positive for yourself.
Keep your living space tidy so that you can enjoy your time at home without feeling overwhelmed by clutter. The more you can keep on top of the messes that are waiting for attention around your home, the easier life gets as you will have a place free from the constant chaos of the world.
Playing/listening to music.
Music can have the ability to lift our mood if we are feeling down, or it can be something that we can relate to if we listen to a type of music that mirrors our mood. Learning how to play music or practicing an instrument can be a great way to spend some time by yourself. Giving yourself a goal of learning how to play a certain song can challenge your mind and be an enjoyable way to spend time alone.
It also gives a sense of satisfaction if you could master the skills to playing the instruments or even mastering music pieces that you like.
Journalling.
No matter what form you adopt (bullet journaling, free writing, sketching, etc.), journaling trains your brain to search for positive things (gratitude, dreams, positivity) instead of focusing on the negatives or imperatives in your life. Over time, this habit rewires your brain in a way that benefits every area of your life.
"Just write."
Another benefit of journaling is that not only does it give you the opportunity for introspection, but it also gives you the space to write down your goals, track your progress, and keep yourself accountable.
Start a journal to help you make sense of what’s going on in your life. Don’t be afraid to write absolutely anything down. Keep track daily as thoughts come up, and don’t worry about where they will head next. Write everything down with an open mind. One of the biggest stumbling blocks for journaling is the intrusive worry of what to write about. My advice is to just write. Words. Sentences. Poems. Crappy jokes. Everything goes as it’s your mind and your rules.
Although there are a lot of benefits that comes with handwritten journalling, it can be quite a hassle for some. You may worry that you don’t have the time to sit down and write or that you worry someone might get a hold of your journal. Worry not. There are a lot of mobile applications available to aid your journal experience. DailyBean, Thinky and Sparkle are some of my personal favourite, that I use religiously. There are prompts available too to help you write if you happen to have writer’s block. You can also add photos and locations to your entries.
Sleep.
Sleep is arguably the most important aspect of self-care, but it’s also probably the most overlooked. It’s so simple and yet most of us take it for granted. Establishing a nighttime routine will not only help you “charge your batteries,” so to speak, but it will also help you feel refreshed, maintain a healthy weight, improve energy and productivity, and stay looking as handsome as a stallion.
So, how can you optimize your sleep routine to reap maximum benefits? The first step is to solidify a nightly skincare routine that is easy to follow.
If you have trouble falling asleep and staying asleep or struggle with racing thoughts at night, you’ll want to find ways in which you can reduce your stress, anxiety, and limit external stimuli. Creating a relaxing atmosphere is the key to creating an optimal sleep environment. I have written a number of sleep hygiene practices that you can follow if you need to read more on it. After a good night’s sleep, everything seems better.
Meditations.
If you’re looking for one of the best self-care ideas for mental health, try meditation. If you have a smartphone, there are many apps that make learning to meditate simple for beginners. If you’ve never meditated, it can be intimidating and really uncomfortable. There are numerous reading materials and methods that you can find in my trusted mobile app, PlusVibes that makes it easy for beginners and just a few minutes of meditation a day can help decrease stress and anxiety and help you sleep better.
Practicing meditation is a great way to focus on yourself, your mind and your body. You can meditate by yourself at home, which means that it can be easier for you to fit in at a time that suits you.
Spend some time alone.
Spend some time alone to recharge your batteries and focus on yourself. This self-care tip for men can be very beneficial. It will help you appreciate the bond between you and other people when they see one another again.
Spending some alone time might give you a fresh perspective about life which could, in turn, lead back to creating better ways of taking care of yourself. It’s a self-help cycle that keeps spinning.
Get a house plant.
Just like plants outside, a plant inside your home purifies the air and releases chemicals in the air that can help to elevate your mood. Even just one house plant can change how your home feels. If you don’t have green thumb, don’t worry – get yourself some succulents.
Take care of your skin.
Good skin care for men involves more than a bar of soap and a disposable razor. A skincare routine helps men’s skin stay fresher and younger looking, which makes your whole appearance just a lot better. It also helps prevent sun damage. Stocking up on just a few essential products like sunscreen, moisturizer, face wash and good quality razor blades makes a world of difference. Plus, taking the time to care for your skin can give you that quiet moment by yourself during your day.
"Good skin care for men involves more than a bar of soap and a disposable razor."
Even if you have no skincare routine to speak of, doing something to your face not only helps it look it’s best, but also just feels damn good. The easiest thing to do for beginners is get a facial moisturizer (look for oil-free if you have oily skin) and apply it after you wash your face morning and night.
Interact with others.
Interacting with friends, family and coworkers is important for good mental health. Social interactions can help strengthen relationships, improve mood and wellbeing as well as offer a sense of belonging. Social interactions don’t need to be face-to-face. You can also interact with others through virtual chats, emails, texts and phone calls, as long as you have human interactions.
Give back to others.
Giving back can improve your mental and physical health. Sign up as volunteer with an organisation that has a mission that inspires you. The possibilities are endless, and you will feel good taking time out of your day to help others.
"Go take care of yourselves!"
There’s no denying that the past year was one of the most stressful years the world has ever experienced, and with that we must remember that self-care is crucial for fostering a healthy mind and for renewing our souls. What was once thought of as something that wasn’t really meant for men has become a way of life for the modern man. In order to live up to your full potential and achieve success, you must have a clear mind. And that is what self-care is all about.
Self care is an important topic that goes deeper than just feeling good or improving a man’s life. It has everything to do with how men impact others around them.
A man taking care of himself can be a radical act of service to others, and a mainstream movement of healthy men could literally change the world for the better. Men, here’s the permission you’ve been waiting for. Go take care of yourselves!
We want and need all men, including yourself, to take control of their mental well-being by investing in self-care practices that will help you manage your emotions and stress levels while boosting their moods instead of letting these things overwhelm them. Don’t be afraid to open up.
Men’s self-care is essential to healthy and fulfilling lives. So take some time this week to think about yourself, what do you need most to feel more robust about your life. Take a look at these tips and suggestions, and remember, they’re not one-size-fits-all solutions. Something that works for you might not be on this list. Bottom line is I just want you to take care of yourself. Explore things that may feel more comfortable and worthy for you.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed or want to talk to someone right now, get anonymous support 24/7 with PlusVibes chat feature which will connect you with a trained therapists who will listen to you, and help you to move forward feeling better. Or even better, if you feel that you are ready to take a bigger leap, go to nearby medical professionals now and they can help you to figure out the appropriate diagnosis and treatment that you may or may not need.
